I came across a reel one day on Facebook that discussed the topic of biophilia. The gentleman said: "Biophilia is the idea that all human beings subconsciously seek connection with the rest of life, that there is an innate human connection to nature, perhaps even an evolutionary adaptation designed to foster a harmonious relationship between humans and the biosphere." And after watching this reel, I discovered something new about myself, that I am a biophilic.
I've always known this about myself, so this is nothing new. It's just that I wasn't able to put a name to it. I just always knew the feeling when my soul craved this connection.... There are times when my stress is couple with overstimulation, and it makes me feel like I am screaming internally. An example of a physical representation of what I am describing is when wear jeans. I detest jeans. They are cute when I put them on, but after 6-8 hours of being in jeans, they start to feel as if my body is rejecting them. They become insanely itchy, and I immediately get an urge that the jeans need to come off.
For the past couple of years, I have worked on ways to decompress when I start feeling this way mentally, and one of these strategies involves allowing myself to sit in nature. I find that it helps to calm my nervous system. Sitting in the warmth of the sun, sensing the breeze of the plants and flowers, and hearing the bird songs as they dance above me is one of the most calming feelings. I often close my eyes as I hear the branches of trees wave in the air, and it feels as if they are almost speaking to me. I take deep breathes to observe and appreciate my surroundings and it brings me a sense of tranquility. Doing so allows me to almost slow down time. With this emotion, I can reboot and recover my innate feelings as well as my long-forgotten ambitions. This is my biophilia.
As I mature into my spiritual essence, I am learning to use and embrace my biophilic nature. I'm learning to trust when nature appeals to me, even if the reasons are beyond my comprehension. This involves having a level of trust within myself. One thing I've grown conscious of and worked hard to develop over the last few years is trusting my intuition. In 2021, I discovered that I'd somehow lost sight of my intuition. I realized I didn't trust my own thoughts and feelings, and it caused so much anxiety and stress within me. This is something that I have been working to reclaim and master. I find that trusting nature and my intuition frequently go hand in hand. When my ideas are jumbled or my thinking is warped, my desire for nature grows.
Let me tell you about an occasion when I had to put my full trust in my biophilic affinity:
One time after work I had decided to go kayaking. It's a great outing for me, as it allows me to be out in water and nature. I love to kickback and relax and just allow the water to guide me while I listen to music, journal on my phone, admire wildlife, and reflect. I've gone kayaking in groups and I've also gone solo. But this kayak outing was an entirely different experience from the rest.
To start, I was having a rough day, a rough couple of days actually. I had been overwhelmed physically, emotionally, and mentally, and I just needed some me-time. Solitude. I wanted some time to relax on the water so that I could clear my heart and mind. It had been warm and sunny all day, so this seemed like the perfect opportunity for me to go kayaking to give myself that moment. I went and got some food and some White Claws for me to have while on the water. I grabbed my waterproof bag and I made it out to the kayaking location with no issues. The sky was sunny. The air was warm. I was excited.
Things took a turn fast. On the way to the drop-off point for kayaking, the sky became dark and cloudy. And then I thought to myself was, "Oh my gawd, it's about to rain. NO- don't think like that JB. It's just a little cloudy, and that doesn't necessarily mean rain."
Deep down inside, I knew that I made a mistake, as I had completely forgot to check the weather to see if we were expecting to get rain showers. I honestly just had not expected to see any rain clouds. It was completely clear and sunny the day up until that point. It didn't rain the day before, or the day before that. So, where in the hell did these alleged rain clouds come from?? As soon I got on the water with my kayak, I felt a rain drop. And it was at that moment that I knew that I messed up. Big time.
It didn't take long for the rain showers to come down. And it wasn't just raining, it was pouring. I could barely see anything. I was by myself on the water. The only other people who were on the water at the time were a group of four girls, but they stopped essentially as soon as we got into the water because of the rain. I didn't stop. Although it was raining, I wanted to keep kayaking as much as I could through the rain, as you have to make back by the required end time of 7pm, and it was already 5pm. The rain was not slowing down whatsoever, so I figured that I would push through as much as I could with the hopes that the rain would eventually stop and I could pace myself and relax until I got to the end. I was wearing a brave face, but this was the first time in all of my nature experience that I was afraid. I was cold, the water was blinding me, and I eventually grew tired from trying to trek through the water while being covered in water. My boat was holding in water fast, so I had to find ways to dump water off the boat. At that moment, I hated that I decided to take myself kayaking.
I was so frustrated that tears had begun to pour out of me. I came kayaking to relieve myself from the stress that I was feeling, not add more to it. It was the first time that I had felt that I hated being on the water. I did not want to be there. I was beginning to reach my breaking point on the water. I put my hands inside of my pockets to keep myself warm, and then I felt a stone inside of my pocket. I pulled it out, forgetting that I had placed a black tourmaline crystal on my right-side pocket. Black tourmaline is a protective stone that has the ability to absorb negative energy and promote grounding. It helps to alleviate stress and anxiety and promote spiritual growth.
And that's when it's magic hit me. Now, when I use the term, "magic", I don't say it in a way that makes you think of hocus pocus magic, or something you see in a movie. Intention is magic. The things that we set for our intentions have the ability to come forth, and that is because life is about perspective. If you decide to be unhappy, you will be unhappy. If you decide to find joy, then you will find peace. If you want to be happy, you will find a way to be happy.
The last few weeks until this moment had me feeling overwhelmed. Stressed. My mind and heart was clouded. I needed peace. I needed a spiritual and mental cleanse. And what I didn't realize up until that point is that a cleanse is exactly what I was getting. The rain was a cleanse. Yes, I didn't want to be on the water, but it was exactly where I needed to be at that time. It was at that moment that I realized that I had been fighting the will of nature. I had to stop fighting the will of God. Instead of fighting and looking at the experience from a negative outlook, why not embrace it? Besides, I told myself, it is just water. I went from being in a panicked state to transcending into a meditational state. I focused only on the stone in my hand and the sound of the rain as it hit the trees. I then closed my eyes and listened to the bird songs. There were two particular birds who I focused on and when I opened my eyes, I noticed that they were playing with each in a tag-like game right above the water. And next thing you know, everything became beautiful. The rain was no longer a threat.
I had a revelation.
I was stressed and unhappy because that was what I was focusing and directing my energy. But if I could see the beauty of being in the middle of the Miami River while its pouring raining and find joy I could apply the same principles to my life outside of that experience. At times, it's easy to focus on fear or pain. Pain can be addicting. It's easy to bury ourselves in our negativity because a major component of negativity is complacency. But we can't be let fear take over when we get outside of our comfort zone. We can't let our anxieties subdue us. At the end of the day, fear is just an excuse. It is something that can hold us back from greatness. Without overcoming fear, we will never evolve.
This was an experience that allowed me to do just that. Evolve.
Jason Mraz- "I won't worry my life away."