Sundays are restorative days for me. It's the only true day that I am able to sleep in and restore myself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Any other day, I'm always highly active and on the go. And I don't mean that just physically. I also mean that mentally. And it's the mental that wears us down more than anything. At least, it's that way for me. We have a million and one tasks, errands, and activities that we have to get through during our weekdays, and it's almost like our brains puts us on autopilot in order to help us get through our weekdays.  And even though we are on autopilot, we still have a number of impending new thoughts and feelings that surface.

Who am I?

I came across a reel one day on Facebook that discussed the topic of biophilia. The gentleman said: "Biophilia is the idea that all human beings subconsciously seek connection with the rest of life, that there is an innate human connection to nature, perhaps even an evolutionary adaptation designed to foster a harmonious relationship between humans and the biosphere." And after watching this reel, I discovered something new about myself, that I am a biophilic.

I originally wrote this poem on August 23, 2023, it was during one of those times of my lows. The overall emotion that I can remember about that time was frustration. I was frustrated with everything that was happening at that time. I was frustrated with my job, because I had felt like I had to pretend to love a job because of the "opportunity"; but I hated it. I was frustrated with my dating life. It was just too many instances of dealing with people who actually pretend themselves, but about intentions. I was frustrated with my personal life. My son wasn't happy. So I wasn't happy. Enough said. I wasn't happy with a friendship. I had realized that I was outgrowing a friendship, because of pretending and false intentions as well. So yes, the more I reflect, the overall feeling was frustration. 

Meet July.

So, I just finished reading, The Black Girl's Guide to Financial Freedom, by Paris Woods, and let me say, this is a must read. Although it's target audience is Black women, there are a lot of helpful insights and advice that anyone can learn from. The book is roughly 180 pages, so its a reasonable short read. However, it packs a lot of information that can be useful to those who are entering their financial independent journey, or to those who are ready to make a change to their financial approach to life. 

So, I am currently reading this book called, The Black Girl's Guide to Financial Freedom, by Paris Woods (don't worry, the book review is to come very soon), and her chapter Dream, start's off the introduction by asking her readers a very important question: What would you didn't have to work for money? Now, I'm sure that we have all been asked this at least once in our life, and I'm sure that we all have an instinctual answer to what the response would be. 

Love. Such a beautiful, yet terrifying concept. But what exactly is love? How do we define it? How do we find it? How do we know what's the right love, or the wrong love? 

I went to my son's first basketball game, and let me just say that my son is absolutely amazing. I don't know if he is a child prodigy or anything because I don't know too much about basketball. But I will say that in the eyes of his mother, he is a pure star. He does a great job at making shots. He actually reminds me of myself back when I was a kid. 

Last week, my skating family and I traveled to Las Vegas for my first skate excursion. I must admit that in the weeks leading up to the trip, I was not looking forward to it and was very anxious. Travel can be naturally stressful. Well, at least for me it is. I'm not a fan of group excursions, as there are too many personalities trying to come together as one, which isn't always successful. You embark on a trip with a planned spending budget, but of course, you always exceed it. When the journey entails air travel, that adds to the anxiety. Although all of these stresses were on my mind leading up to the travel, that's not what made me the most anxious. What I found to be the most nerve-wrecking for me was the fact that I was going on the trip for the skate party. 

When I first finished this poem, I told my self that I would never share it with others because it's too personal. Those that know me know that I do not like to harbors on my shortcomings or setbacks. I try to have a positive mindset because life is too cruel to let yourself get buried in pain, for pain can become addicting if you get too used to the feeling. Now, pain is not a bad thing. It allows us to know what joy is and It's needed in order to build character. As you mature, you learn the importance of duality. You learn how to ride out the highs and lows. The trick is to do it as you see fit. Not others.

So, I've set a goal for 2025 to read 100 books by the end of the year. 25 books on four different subjects. And I just finished my second my book so far, called Why Greatness Cannot Be Planned: The Myth of the Objective, written by Kenneth O. Stanley & Joel Lehman.